Songs and relationships 2

To know that there's someone that would be there until the last minute of our existence, Thus we jump to the song by Deathcab for cutie called: What Sarah said. There's a line there, That "Love is watching someone die", An invisible tear ran at the side of my cheek when I first heard that song, real ones came out when I heard that line, I could relate to that, having family members die in front of me, really sticks a needle in my heart when that song plays.

My grandpa and I were close in his later years, He was funny supportive and extremely smart, He was a great man, One morning he was hard at breathing I tried everything in my power to save him, cpr, mouth to mouth breathing, blood circulation, everything I know and what my Aunt gave advice on the phone, Still he died, the look on his face was so imprinted in my head, He was in excrutiating pain, breathing heavily, tired and so lost and scared, After the initial shock and the last death grip in his body, His face calmed down, I have never seen a man's face so calm, then it dawned at me, Pops was dead, at first I was so shocked, I could'nt really process the thoughts and confusion that was going thru at that time, I was in drone mode, everything felt automatic, I held my tears and drove him to a hospital, I was thinking maybe he was still hanging on, maybe there's a couple of years left in him, more time for me to show him and tell him how great his life was, how great a man he became and was, I was his number one fan.

Doc said no deal, it already ended, still no tears had been shed, I thought better accept the fact that we all die, why feel pain when dying at an old age? No tears should be spent, It's futile. I went home to get some things for his burial service, I rested in my room and turned on the radio, just to keep my ears distracted just for a little bit. A song came up,

Love of mine some day you will die
But I'll be close behind
I'll follow you into the dark

No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of a spark
If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

In Catholic school as vicious as Roman rule
I got my knuckles brusied by a lady in black
And I held my toungue as she told me
"Son fear is the heart of love"
So I never went back

If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

You and me have seen everything to see
From Bangcock to Calgary
And the soles of your shoes are all worn down
The time for sleep is now
It's nothing to cry about
Cause we'll hold each other soon
The blackest of rooms

If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
Then I'll follow you into the dark





Tears fell. I've never felt that way in a song before.
When I'm ready...
I will follow you in the dark.