What's wrong?

I wonder what is wrong with me? Why can't I accept life? Why can't I accept myself? Why can't I accept most things? I'm in reflection with my life right now, as I reflect on the things I did and want to do with my life.

There is one thing that hinders me from being great. It's Accepting losing people you love, I'm so scared to lose the people in my life that I love, maybe that's why I can't seem to open up to others in a deeper sense, it's the fact that if they get too close and get lost, I'd get my spirits down even deeper, I crave acceptance, In fact that is what I look for in a relationship, in a family, it is to accept life as it is. Yes, we dream of grander things and yes, we strive to survive, what is it that we are living for? I now know what it is, and it is love, she haven't seem to find me but I already found her.